Relationships

For the past 4 years since my divorce, I have been avoiding one issue. I have been trying NOT to meet someone. I have focused on myself. That is a good thing in many ways. I have worked out my demons with my lost 20 year marriage. I have found myself again. I have mourned my daughter growing up and moving off. I have even dated fom time to time. However, I really did not want to "find" anyone. The main way in which I have avoided meeting a special man is that I have gained weight, cut my hair very short and dressed in a  rather masculine way. Ellen Degeneris has been my fashion role model  I am a teacher and the other day a student asked me if I was gay. I have nothing against lesbians. Sometimes I wish I was gay. It would be easier to meet someone but I am not. If I am putting off a gay vibe, I am definately NOT attracting that special guy. So, with the help of my blog buddies, I am going to get myself into "dating" form. I know that in a perfect world I should not have to do this. My soul mate should be able to see the true "me" and fall madly in love with me. But, I don't think that is realistic. There are so few available 50ish men out there, I will need to spiff up the package to even get to know if someone is a kindrid spirit. So here I go.

Stats:

49 years old

5'6

179lbs

Short red hair

I am starting a diet and exercise program immediatly. I wasnt to use my blog to chart my progress.